I'm not sleeping well. I wake up with my mind spiraling in 16 different directions. My stomach has been tied up in knots so tight I can barely breathe, let alone eat. Every single nerve in my body is fired and ready to kick-start my sprint away from all the dangers that are lurking around every corner of the interwebs. In short, my PTSD has been re-activated.
What I've decided to do to help myself is stop buying into the rhetoric and join
NaBloPoMo began and continues to be a writing challenge to help people who love to write get into a regular writing routine by posting daily for a month. Whenever I've *participated--and I use that word loosely--it's always been to add a touch of structure to my peculiar schedule. Right now I need a distraction. I'm pretty sure **Melissa Ford picked September's theme especially for me. Don't you?
I have a stockpile of photos that I never posted because being online made my headaches worse. It's very likely that I'll simply toss those up most of the time. Should I decide to post something other than photographs, there are plenty of thought-provoking and just plain fun prompts.
Since this is the first day, I figured, why not start at the beginning. So I did.
* I have never linked a post to BlogHer during a NaBloPoMo nor have I visited the other participants. Shameful, I know.
** I've never met Melissa Ford. To my knowledge, she's never met me.
1 If you feel the need to share your or a friend's story about any form of sexual assault, for the love of whatever it is you hold dearest, please insert a warning at the beginning of your tale before you toss it out there into the interwebs. One thing all survivors have in common is a trigger response to anything that brings them back to their own experience. Each of us is in a different place in the healing process. Please respect that and front-load your story with something as simple as, "This may contain language or content that could be a trigger for those of you who've been sexually abused or assaulted." Thank you.
Pee Ess: September is one of our busiest months. If adding this to my already busy schedule doesn't help, Je vais passer au Canada. Comprenez-vous?